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Heather There were references to sex, generally in a positive way as in “by doing these things, you will have more time in your life for good relationships in…moreThere were references to sex, generally in a positive way as in “by doing these things, you will have more time in your life for good relationships including sex.” I didn’t feel comfortable listening to this in the car with my 5 and 6 yo because of this as well as some of the afore mentioned violent references, but it might be ok for age 15. (less) Community Reviews· 14,521 ratings · 1,335 reviews Start your review of Barking Up the Wrong Tree: The Surprising Science Behind Why Everything You Know About Success Is (Mostly) Wrong
Readable to the extreme. Loved the way the author stepped back from all the psychology popular stuff. He went to great length to show that
all the 'go and become the hero', 'get it done' approach, 'don't say quits until you drop!' stuff can be counterproductive at times, though not always.
May 09, 2019 Trevor rated it really liked it Now, Rick recommended this one to me – and put it under the category
of a ‘good business self-help book’ – which, well, it sort of is, but it sort of isn’t too. This is a bit more like a book that I might shelve under behavioural economics/psychology. There are things I didn’t particularly like about it, but we will get to that. Much of what it has to say that might do you some good involves thinking about the stuff you say to yourself about yourself. And the really nice thing this book will give Much of what it has to say that might do you some good involves thinking about the stuff you say to yourself about yourself. And the really nice thing this book will give you
permission to do is to be kind to yourself – which, when all is said and done, really is something many of us need to be given permission to do. I think many of us are far more forgiving of other people than we are of ourselves – and that’s a pity, because most of us are much nicer people than we give ourselves credit for. Much nicer than some of the bastards we are forgiving towards… I’ve always had a problem with ideas like ‘the secret’ or ‘positive psychology’ or what I think of as
optimism as ideology. I’m not particularly someone who basks in endless reserves of self-confidence, but that said, that doesn’t mean that I’m particularly attracted to people who do have endless stores of self-confidence either. The overly self-confident often strike me as fairly stupid. I much prefer people who are a bit more self-aware. Not least, as the author says here at some point, because when the overly self-confident do finally get to see themselves in a mirror, and see that their
over-confidence wasn’t really based on anything, no matter how that works out, it generally doesn’t work out well – you know, the choices being either a crushing loss of confidence or denial. A lot of the advice in this book can be brought back to the notion of ‘deliberative practice’ – you know, you can be an expert in just about anything if you spend 10,000 hours practicing at it – as long as that practice is structure so as to always test your limits so as to exceed them – what Vygotsky
called your ‘zone of proximal development’. The author quotes another education god in this – Bloom (the taxonomy man) in something I’ve only learnt recently that Bloom was interested in, what he called the two sigma problem. Bloom said that people who are taught one-on-one do much, much better at learning just about everything than people taught in group situations. He felt that a key task of education research ought to be to find out how to make that gap disappear. Let’s face it, very few of
us are likely to get an education from an expert on a one-to-one basis, so finding out how to teach groups as effectively as in one-to-one teaching would be a pretty damn good thing for just about all of us. Bloom said that virtually anyone can learn virtually anything – as long as the conditions are right. This really is something we ought to know and believe. If we really did believe that, it would change our lives. In some ways this comes down to our bullshit beliefs around talent. We
often think that talent is something we are born with – I can feel my eye twitching as I type that. The problem with believing something like that is that a single failure can be interpreted as a lack of natural ability. And that really is stupid. If Vygotsky is right about his idea that we learn the most when we are right at the cusp of our abilities, then failure is not just inevitable, it is also the only way we can learn anything. Natural ability isn’t about not failing, talent is in
structuring the learning so that failing helps us improve, rather than being a huge kick in the guts. But while we might be able to learn anything, or even achieve anything, the other thing this book makes clear is that we can’t achieve everything – to achieve one thing has opportunity costs – and so we need to give up stuff to get stuff. I’m never going to do some of the stuff recommended here – map my time so I can see what is directed at achieving my goals compared to other stuff that
isn’t – but I can see it makes sense. I really liked the discussion in this on people who totally dedicate themselves to becoming the best in their field – how this often involves cutting out all other things in their lives and almost by definition then becoming basically arse-holes. Whether it is Einstein, Newton, Kafka, some baseball guy, some navy guy – success often seems to be predicated on being a turd to just about everyone around you. Maybe that type of success isn’t always worth
having? I also liked that telling stories to yourself and making things into games were seen as important aspects of succeeding. This was, in some ways, the ‘I think I can’ part of the book, but only in the sense that those who generally succeed do so by chunking tasks into winnable games and then playing at those as a game within a game. Doing that, and then being kind to yourself when things don’t quite work out – when you lose the match say – allows you to regroup and then focus on the
next match. Now, this sort of brings me to the things I didn’t find all that good here. I found some of the stories a bit annoying. I find I get quite bored by sports stories – especially when I have no idea at all about the sport – I find sports insanely boring, so I struggle to give a stuff about some guy who could really hit a ball – what an ultimate waste of a life. I also find that silly bits of writing – in this case where the author does sort of cute talking to the reader – annoy
me a bit more than it totally reasonable. I also think that the book places too much stress on ‘finding your vocation’ which I think is counter to some of the other arguments here. This reminded me of Aristotle – that everyone has their own natural ability and that they should find and do that. The problem is that, as the book makes clear later, people who do just one thing often end up pretty stuffed up. I’ve said this elsewhere, but I’m becoming more and more attracted to Marx’s idea that we
should be many things, rather than just one thing, and that being many things is a kind of useful definition of what being a healthy human is. That said, this book does provide some useful advice. Not least, and to say it again, around the idea of being kind to yourself. Do that – do that often.
Jul 05, 2017 Mehrsa rated it liked it Completely forgettable and totally unsurprising science behind everything I've already heard everywhere else. All the books in this genre should be called Kahneman and Tserversky lite. There's got to be some behavioral flaw to explain why I keep reading these books even though they tell me the same thing over and over again. Completely forgettable and totally unsurprising science behind everything I've already heard everywhere else. All the books in this genre should be called Kahneman and Tserversky lite. There's got to be some behavioral flaw to explain why I keep reading these books even though they tell me the same thing over and over again. ...more
Bad boys do well in life. Much better than the class toppers, says Eric Barker, in his primer for success. The best lessons in cooperation come from gang members, pirates and
serial killers, continues Eric Barker in this how-to-strategize-and-be-successful guide. Sensational theories, but Barker, a former Hollywood screenwriter , uses stories, research studies and liberally quotes the gurus of productivity and psychology to buttress his analysis and advice . The book has 6 chapters, all with cat The book has 6 chapters, all with catchy subtitles like 'Does Playing by the Rules Pay Off ? Insight from Valedictorians, People Who Feel No Pain, and
Piano Prodigies' . Or 'What We Can Learn About Walking the Tightrope Between Confidence and Delusion from Chess Masters, Secret Military Units, Kung Fu Con Artists, and People Who Cannot Feel Fear' In the chapter subtitled 'What Navy SEAL's, Video Games, Arranged Marriages, and Batman can Teach Us About Sticking it Out When Achieving Success is Hard' , Barker explains why playing games are important ."We can apply game mechanics to our lives and turn dull moments into fun ones " he says
quoting productivity guru Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi . A game is a win and data shows that consistently small wins are even better at producing happiness than occasionally bagging an elephant. Of course investing these games with meaning is key . Barker tells the story of how Steve Jobs lured John Sculley away from his great job as CEO of Pepsi. He asked him,"Do you want to spend the rest of your life selling sugared water or do you want a chance to change the world?" Meaningful doesn't have
to be saving orphans or curing the sick. As long as your story is meaningful to you, it has power "he says . Each chapter has parable-like stories , like those of Ashlyn Blocker the girl who feels no pain, Alfredo Hinojosa the brilliant immigrant , Michael Swango the killer doctor, Glenn Gould the obsessive pianist or Joe Simpson the survivor mountaineer . Barker quotes and liberally, from a galaxy of distinguished behavioural economists like Kahnemann and Dan Ariely, from literary figures
like David Foster Wallace and icons like Charlie Chaplin and Albert Einstein. Then there's the advice , which appears at the end of each of the six chapters. Like 'Rule 1 :Pick the Right Pond Rule 2 : Cooperate first ' or 'Believing in yourself is Nice . Forgiving Yourself is Better ' . Chapter 6, the concluding chapter ends with stepping back to examine how career success aligns with success in life - where Harvard Business School Clayton Christensen and ( yes !) Mongol warrior Genghis
Khan provide examples of how to find peace in a fast moving world . Most of Barker's advice( 'Know yourself. Network. Join Groups. Always Follow Up') is plain common sense and has been done to death . But Barker does manage to liven up the lectures . And if you like gimmicky , this screenwriter turned blogger turned author is up there. Plus he is prolific in his parables of modern day success. From the Navy Seals to Dalai Lama to Steve Job, each chapter has several stories. He quotes generously and is himself quotable - definitely the stuff of motivational presentations ! ...more
[Abandanded 50% of the way through] It's rare that I abandon a book. However, this book was enough of a struggle to get through that I decided to cut my losses. It is not that book isn't well written (it
is). It's not that it isn't slightly funny (it is). I gave up on reading it because the style was just not for me. Each chapter seemed to hop, skip and jump all over the place. The book covered all aspects of personal development...from work/life balance to networking to what makes people "succe It's rare that I abandon a book. However, this book was enough of a struggle to get through that I decided to cut
my losses. It is not that book isn't well written (it is). It's not that it isn't slightly funny (it is). I gave up on reading it because the style was just not for me. Each chapter seemed to hop, skip and jump all over the place. The book covered all aspects of personal development...from work/life balance to networking to what makes people "successful" and more. Within each chapter the author seemed to both validate conventional wisdom but also spin a gladwell-ian yarn about conventional
wisdom isn't the only truth. I ended up being confused about what the book was actually asserting! Further, much of the book was a collage of quotes and citings of other semi-famous non-fiction authors....from Charles Duhigg (Power of Habit) to Dan Coyle (Talent Code) to Eriksson (10,000 Hours / Peak) and more. I felt like I was being "name dropped" on constantly and it made the book tough to read. Sometimes, books can cover a broad subject like personal development and "success" and make
it work (as in Mastery by Robert Greene, The Road to Character by Brooks or even Gladwell's work) but in this case it was too disjointed and scattered to continue with.
Jun 15, 2017 Lorilin rated it really liked it We all have ideas of what we think makes people successful. And
though author Eric Barker claims to "EXPLODE ALL THE MYTHS!!" in this book, his ideas aren't actually all that crazy--and certainly not so crazy that we've never heard them before. In fact, I recognized more than a few ideas summarized from other books I've read (like Give and
Take: A Revolutionary Approach to Success, Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking,
Just Enough: Tools for Creating Success in Your We all have ideas of what we think makes people successful. And though author Eric Barker claims to "EXPLODE ALL THE MYTHS!!" in this book, his ideas aren't actually
all that crazy--and certainly not so crazy that we've never heard them before. In fact, I recognized more than a few ideas summarized from other books I've read (like Give and Take: A Revolutionary Approach to Success,
Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking,
Just Enough: Tools for Creating Success in Your Work and Life, and the list goes on). The great thing about Barking Up the Wrong Tree, though, is that, not only is Barker a great story teller, he's also very clear, specific, and organized in the way
he presents his information. In other words, he makes learning really, really fun. There are six chapters in the book. Chapter 1 talks about how people become successful--some by rising through the ranks over time, others by being so different and driven that they bust down the door and invite themselves to the party. Chapter 2 discusses the importance of being kind and giving (without being a martyr). Chapter 3 argues that knowing when to quit is just as important as having grit. Chapter 4
points out the many benefits of having a network, but emphasizes that it should be built by giving to others. Chapter 5 argues that self-compassion is more important than self-esteem. And Chapter 6 talks about the power of good close relationships. There is a lot of information to absorb in here, and it can be overwhelming, but Barking Up the Wrong Tree is still an incredibly interesting and educational book. I think my favorite part is the conclusion where Barker sums it all
up: What's the most important thing to remember when it comes to success? Alignment. Success is not the result of any single quality; it's about alignment between who you are and where you choose to be. The right skill in the right role. A good person surrounded by other good people. A story that connects you with the world in a way that keeps you going. A network that helps you, and a job that leverages your natural introversion or extroversion. A level of confidence that keeps you
going while learning and forgiving yourself for the inevitable failures. A balance between [happiness, achievement, significance, and legacy] that creates a well-rounded life with no regrets. At the end of the day, having a successful life really comes down to knowing who you are and finding a place where you can be exactly that. It's such a simple message, but a powerful one, too. See more of my reviews at
www.BugBugBooks.com! ARC provided through Amazon Vine.
Sep 01, 2017 Emma Sea rated it it was ok Why Everything You Know About Success Is (Mostly) Wrong, Unless You've Read Any Other Productivity Book From this Century. On the plus side, productivity classics like Cal Newport's
Deep Work: Rules for Focused Success in a Distracted World, or Susan Cain's
Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking, are summarized in a single page each, so if you're new to this, the book works as a speed learning hack. On the plus side, productivity classics like Cal Newport's Deep Work: Rules for Focused Success in a Distracted World, or Susan Cain's
Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking, are summarized in a single page each, so if you're new to this, the book works as a speed learning hack.
Jun 11, 2017 Ahn Mur rated it liked it Started off strong and then slowly lost steam. First half of the book contains a few gems, but by the second half, the reflection gets to be a bit fluffier and less definitive / more of the same from other books in the genre.
Sep 14, 2017 Yaser Had rated it did not like it I honestly, can’t get my mind around those reviewers
who never bring their opinions about the book they’ve read out loud. I mean those reviewers simply summarize the book and quote some of the book points or phrases without bringing their critical review of the book. What is the benefit of reading a book and never show your critical views about it? What I mean exactly are those reviewers who give these books “ Five Stars”! I personally think that this book is not worth it and it’s unbelievably ov I personally think that this
book is not worth it and it’s unbelievably overrated. The author has made some certain research papers thinking they would fit into this vague ideas. The author is jumping from here and there and I didn’t understand what he is trying to make. He took lots of ideas from other books like Thrive, Quiet: The Power of Introverts, and some others without bringing something new to the table. In his introduction, he talked about filtered and unfiltered students, and how millionaires have low GPA back in
school where high-performance students end up with positions lower the CEOs. But the author never elaborated about filtered and unfiltered people; he jumped from one topic to another with no relation between them and without closing his points. He didn’t bring anything new to me other than his wonderful introduction that deceives you into thinking that next chapters would be awesome. I thought this book is boring and everything I have read is common sense and nothing much. The author was in
hurry making this book because he wanted to compile all his unrelated ideas and thoughts into one book. I thought he could make it much better than if he had taken his time making this book. Lots of anecdotes and some humor yet the wisdom of the situations he mentioned are very common and known to even a high school student. And for those who gave this book 5 stars ! all I can say: “wow !! you are as the book stated … filtered”. I apologize.
Sep 27, 2017 Sofia rated it really liked it I heard this audio book in my car whilst driving. It was a good companion. As Barker says he is not inventing the wheel here. What he did was remind me of the lessons I had learned in the past and gave me new examples or case histories. What holds through the book is the
message: Know thyself Find balance Be positive Focus A good voice and message to hear. Fits into slot 20 of my book challenge - a book with career advice - here I had career and life advice aplenty. Know thyself Find balance Be positive Focus A good voice and message to hear. Fits into slot 20 of my book challenge - a book with career advice - here I had career and life advice aplenty.
This is like a crib sheet summary of many other books. So if you've read much about the science of happiness/success/effectiveness then this will not be "surprising" news. If you haven't read anything before and only want to read one book, then this might do the trick. The problem is that by skimming the surface of all these different studies, the author winds up sounding wishy-washy: extroversion,
confidence, persistence are the secrets to a good life except when the exact opposites are better! This is like a crib sheet summary of many other books. So if you've read much about the science of happiness/success/effectiveness then this will not be "surprising" news. If you haven't read anything before and only want to read one book, then this might do the trick. The problem is that by skimming the surface of all these different studies, the
author winds up sounding wishy-washy: extroversion, confidence, persistence are the secrets to a good life except when the exact opposites are better! In the end, the advice is to align with what's right for you, and that is basically the concept of Flow, so personally I would recommend just reading that to get an appreciation of where that advice comes from and a deeper understanding of the nuances.
Flow: The Psychology of Optimal Experience
Apr 07, 2018 Dave Lawrence rated it did not like it Chocked full of the narrative
fallacy. Some of the advice seemed good and to confirm my own opinions of success. However, upon further reflection, the book is loaded with the narrative fallacy—many of the success stories cannot be attributed to his principles but to luck. He looks at the most successful people; from a learning standpoint this is actually bad because, to quote nobel prize winner "The
basic mess Some of the advice seemed good and to confirm my own opinions of success. However, upon further reflection, the book is loaded with the narrative fallacy—many of the success stories cannot be attributed to his principles but to luck. He looks at the most successful people; from a learning standpoint this is actually bad because, to quote nobel prize winner "The basic message of Built to Last and other similar books is that good managerial practices can be identified and that good practices will be rewarded by good results. Both messages are overstated. The comparison of firms that have been more or less successful is to a significant extent a comparison between firms that have been more or less lucky. Knowing the importance of luck, you should
be particularly suspicious when highly consistent patterns emerge from the comparison of successful and less successful firms. In the presence of randomness, regular patterns can only be mirages. " Barker's stories are oversimplified, and he falls into the trap. Probably the most useful part of the book are the steps that Barker outlines. However, his quality of thinking is so low, that I'm starting to doubt the usefulness of those processes. :/
Jun 26, 2017 Mart Roben rated it it was amazing Have you ever read a self-help book that gave you
all the answers, only to find that real world is far too messy to make use of “simple truths”? Or, from the other side of the genre, have you read a self-help book preaching how everything is relative, leading to the inevitable conclusion that you should stop making choices and stop trying in life? “Barking Up the Wrong Tree” falls in the sweet-spot between the dumb templates and the blind acceptance. The book explores research about life decision The
book explores research about life decisions and offers bits that hold scientifically true. Rather than giving a success plan to follow, it envisages likely outcomes of alternative paths. A lot is psychologically hardwired (sorry, you can’t “fake it till you make it”), but there are small choices and possibilities to optimise. Barker presents facts in a delightfully counterintuitive way. (Turns out the best way to impede a workplace opportunist who takes advantage of colleagues’ good will
is… gossip!) The author has done the hard work of original investigation. You could tell because his stories and examples are not the standard recycled ones usually found in popular psychology. I also enjoyed how statistical comparisons are used to make scientific findings more tangible. (Having few friends is more dangerous than obesity and is the equivalent health risk of smoking fifteen cigarettes a day.) A great read if you want to know how much (or how little) popular success maxims
are supported by actual science.
Started out strong, but about halfway through it just got bogged down with too much detail. Some good nuggets, but in need of some serious editing.
The funnest, the most out-of-the-box analysis, on the keys for success This is the 1st book I've ever pre-ordered. I am a regular
reader of the blog Barking Up The Wrong Tree, and I once thought would it be cool if Eric Barker can make a book out of these gems? And my God he did, and it did not disappoint one bit. Like Dale Carnegie, Eric Barker uses so many stories, book references and great quotations to make his points accross. There are stories such as how a poor boy in Mexico can become a wor This is the 1st book I've ever pre-ordered. I am a regular reader of the blog Barking Up The Wrong Tree, and I once thought would it be cool if Eric Barker can make a book out of these gems? And my God he did, and it did not disappoint one bit. Like Dale Carnegie, Eric Barker uses so many stories, book references and great quotations to make his points accross. There are stories such as how a poor boy in Mexico can become a world class neuro surgeon, how a clinically
crazy person can win the enduring Race Across America, or how can an illiterate person in a horrible time and place and without proper education can conquer more land in 25 years than the Romans ever did in 400 years. There are also eye opening stories of how trust is completely lost in a Moldovan culture, how crimes create street gangs (and not the other way around) for protection, and how surprisingly civilised and organised pirates were. The author then back them up with numerous
scientific findings to validate the points he is making, just like the approach of Daniel Kahneman. For example, there are scientific explanations on why some people never quit, why people have depression, and why people commit suicide. Moreover, there are explanations on why high achievers can sometimes have anxiety problem or even depression, why the number ones in high school (the valedictorians) so rarely become the number ones in real life, why beautiful people normally becomes more
successful, why nice guys finish first and last (and not in the middle), and why high achievers are rarely active in their social media accounts. Along the way we'll learn so many amusing facts, such as how an IQ of 120 does not make much difference than 180, 2 and a half to 4 hours after we wake up is when our brains is at its sharpest, how Hedonic Adaptation explains why after a brief change everything change back to baseline (e.g. on diet and clean behaviour), how viagra started out as
a medicine for angina that had a serendipitous "side effect", that the US once had an (almost official) emperor, Emperor Norton I. And we'll also gain some great wisdom like "sometimes an ugly duckling can be a swan if it finds the right pond" or "life is noisy and complex, and we don't have perfect information about others and their motives. Writing people off can be due to just lack of clarity", or "things aren't as scary when we have our hands on the wheels." All of these wealth
of information are then knitted nicely to become the central theme of the book: to discover the core determinants of success, through considering both sides of the argument with extreme stories and scientific facts. In each individual chapters the book then provide concluding analysis, such as the importance of quiting something that is not good for you to make room and time for something good for you, the scientific explanation on luck as a function of choice, the disadvantages dreaming
will cause on your wellbeing, effort and reality, the best predictor of our child's emotional well-being is whether they knew their family history, the importance of sleep and self-compassion, and many more. The author also gives us so many practical tools for us to work out the determinant factors for succcess, on our own unique way, such as Shawn Anchor's "twenty second rule", Cal Newport's "shutdown ritual", how to skillfully and sincerely use our network, figuring out whether we're
filtered or unfiltered leader, the importance of setting a parameter in a negotiation, and the findings of Robert Epstein research on how to reduce stress, among many others. All in all, this book is the most complete analysis for its subject, using unorthodox approach and very amusing wide range of information that makes it very fun to read. What Freakonomics did for economics, Why Do Men Have Nipples? did for medicine, and Moonwalking With Einstein did with memory, Barking Up the Wrong
Tree does it brilliantly with exploring the keys for success in the real world. I couldn't recommend it more.
Jul 15, 2021 Maliha rated it it was amazing In this book you'll meet crazy cyclists, people who don't feel pain
and fear, oddball pianist, serial killers, pirates, prison gangs, Navy Seals, Toronto raccoons, Shaolin monks, how long you can be Batman, Erdos numbers, Newton and Einstein, Ted Williams and Spiderman, radar wars between Harvard and MIT, ghost armies and hostage negotiaters, the Emperor of United States of America (may he rest in peace), confident chess computers, Japanese wrestlers with orange hair, Genghis Khan, and a guy who In this book you'll
meet crazy cyclists, people who don't feel pain and fear, oddball pianist, serial killers, pirates, prison gangs, Navy Seals, Toronto raccoons, Shaolin monks, how long you can be Batman, Erdos numbers, Newton and Einstein, Ted Williams and Spiderman, radar wars between Harvard and MIT, ghost armies and hostage negotiaters, the Emperor of United States of America (may he rest in peace), confident chess computers, Japanese wrestlers with orange hair, Genghis Khan, and a guy who flew around the
world just to say "Thanks" There are basically 7 topics this book discusses in detail which are as follows: 1. What really produces success? By looking at the science behind what separates the extremely successful from the rest of us, we learn what we can do to be more like them - and find out in some cases why it's good that we aren't. 2. Should we play it safe and do what we're told if we want to succeed? Does playing by the rules pay off? Insight from
Valedictorians, people who feel no pain, and piano prodigies. 3. Do nice guys finish last? What can you learn about trust cooperation and kindness... From gang members, pirates and serial killers. 4. Do quitters never win and winners never quit? What Navy SEALs, videos games, arranged marriages, and Batman can teach us about sticking it out when achieving success is hard. 5. It's not what you know, it's who you know (unless it really is what you know) What
we can learn about the power of networks from hostage negotiaters, top comedians, and the smartest man who ever lived. 6. Believe in yourself.... Sometimes What we can learn about walking the tightrope between confidences and delusion from chess masters, secret military units, kung fu con artists, and people who cannot feel fear. 7. Work, work, work . . . Or work-life balance? How to find harmony between home and the office, courtesy of Spiderman, buddhist monks, Albert
Einstein, professional wrestlers, and Genghis Khan. This book is an insane rollercoaster ride to finding out what exactly makes a successful life! Loved it! Would absolutely recommend to everyone!
Jul 27, 2017 Michele Feng rated it it was amazing I was really intrigued by what was dictated by
the "eulogy values" outlined in a section of this book. The final definition of success (legacy if you will) is in a person's eulogy. The values engraved as those expressed in eulogies are those that are personal stories that filter messiness of life, many of which bring meaning for life that consequently entail "cognitive reappraisal" for an optimistic life. In retrospect, I learned that to have "grit" is to just quit (not simply quit, yet strategi I
was really intrigued by what was dictated by the "eulogy values" outlined in a section of this book. The final definition of success (legacy if you will) is in a person's eulogy. The values engraved as those expressed in eulogies are those that are personal stories that filter messiness of life, many of which bring meaning for life that consequently entail "cognitive reappraisal" for an optimistic life. In retrospect, I learned that to have "grit" is to just quit (not simply quit, yet
strategically so). The "WOOP" framework (Wish, outcome, obstacle, plan) if so followed during the peak of anyone's challenges can find solutions without unnecessary and excess turmoil. In the end, I also learned that it is our PERSONAL DEFINITION OF SUCCESS THAT MATTERS THE MOST. The only determent to achieving this is the misplacement of time and effort. So pick your "pond," where one can learn, strengthen and thrive. "When you align your values with the employment of your signature skills
in a context that reinforces these same strengths, you create a powerful and emotionally engaging force for achievement, significance, happiness and legacy." (Barker, 2017, p. 263)
May 14, 2017 Jami Lilo rated it it was amazing What a thoughtful and entertaining book. This gem kept me engaged as I learned about pirates and prisons and valedictorians success rate right out of the gate. The author uses studies and facts to create arguments and then plays devils advocate to view a different side of the coin. The lessons are told in a conversational way and asks questions that you can think about yourself or talk to co-workers/ friends about. It's a great mix of science and psychology and applying the information in your e What a thoughtful and entertaining book. This gem kept me engaged as I learned about pirates and prisons and valedictorians success rate right out of the gate. The author uses studies and facts to create arguments and then plays devils advocate to view a different side of the coin. The lessons are told in a conversational way and asks questions that you can think about yourself or talk to co-workers/ friends about. It's a great mix of science and psychology and applying the information in your every day life. I enjoyed this very much and the conversations it's helped me start with others. ...more
Nov 24, 2017 Bjoern Rochel rated it it was amazing Thoroughly enjoyed this one. It's balanced and full of interesting anecdotes to underline its arguments. The style reminded me of "Teams of teams", which I can also highly recommend Thoroughly enjoyed this one. It's balanced and full of interesting anecdotes to underline its arguments. The style reminded me of "Teams of teams", which I can also highly recommend ...more
Feb 14, 2020 Raghu rated it it was ok I cannot remember how this book ended up in my 'to read' list. I don't generally read self-help or motivational books. The title suggested a contrarian outlook. Perhaps, that is what interested me in reading it. Still, I am always skeptical about books that try to tell you that they have decoded the path to something that has eluded many others. The standard wisdom on success practically
includes everything from being a friendly, pleasant person to being a driven, singularly-focused individual. The standard wisdom on success practically includes everything from being a friendly, pleasant person to being a driven, singularly-focused individual. In between, the advice is to be a good listener and exude supreme confidence under most trying circumstances. Discipline, courage, and being yourself are some other traits that are supposed to make you successful. 'Discover who you are,' say some others. 'Love is the ultimate answer,' say yet others with supreme conviction. Hope,
action, and focus are also qualities that contribute to success. Many others say that there is no one set of rules that brings achievement to everyone. Each one of us is supposed to have our specific key to success, and once we find it, success will follow. The title of this book says 'the Surprising Science Behind Why Everything You Know About Success Is (Mostly) Wrong.' I expected the author to suggest some compelling, contrarian scientific arguments to counter most of the keys mentioned
above. But I was mostly disappointed, not only by the style but also the content. It would be a stretch to claim the author's arguments as science, even though the book has an extensive list of references. The book makes for breezy reading because it is a collection of stories. A book such as this would naturally invite the question of what success is. Depending on the definition, we would ask the follow-up question of whether there are any universally applicable ways of achieving
success. Eric Barker answers that "we get hung up on the heights of success we see in the media and forget that it's our definition of success that matters." In other words, Barker says, "what defines success for you is, well, up to you." With such a flexible definition, it is easy to characterize most anecdotal events as successes or failures and then look at their causes. So, Barker's approach to researching the keys to success is through a large number of parables from modern-day
success stories. There are anecdotes from the lives of famous people like Winston Churchill, Abraham Lincoln, Charlie Chaplin, Albert Einstein, Paul Erdos, and even Genghis Khan. Somewhat obscure people like Jure Robic, Michael Swango, and Glenn Gould also find mention as examples. Swango was particularly interesting as he was a doctor cum serial killer and very successful in his serial-killing. Barker makes an engaging analysis of what made him so good at killing! The book is full of
quotes, arguments for and against a proposition, and then a resolution. My favorite quote from the book is the one attributed to Kurt Vonnegut, who said, "We are what we pretend to be, so we must be careful about what we pretend to be." So, what does Eric Barker say are the keys to success? As far as I can gather, it is probably the following chunks: Whatever you want to accomplish, approach it as a game, define end goals, and work on them by reaching smaller intermediate goals.
Elsewhere, Eric Barker cites some examples and correlations with success in life that do not carry much conviction. He says that famous figures like Lincoln, Gandhi, Michaelangelo, and Mark Twain all lost a parent before age sixteen. The
list of orphans who became spectacular successes is long and includes no fewer than fifteen British prime ministers. I don't know why becoming a prime-minister of Britain should be considered a success in life? Then, why not the PM of Nigeria or Mali? The author says that due to their unique personality and circumstances, these orphans overcompensated and turned tragedy into fuel for greatness. Is he saying that being an orphan increases our chances of success in life? Is it even ethical to
contemplate such a possibility? If we take his example of Gandhi, his father died when he was sixteen, but his mother lived for another six years. In the 19th century India, the father usually exercised much control over his children's life and growth as an adult. One can say that Gandhi freed himself from this control at sixteen, and that is the reason why he could explore life in South Africa by age 24. But Gandhi did not become the Mahatma that we know today overnight. It happened over the
next many decades through his life experience both in Africa and India. To attribute his father's death as a salient cause would be at best clutching at straws to explain Gandhi's rise. A lot of the advice in the book feels like plain common
sense. I didn't get much out of it as new insights. Still, some readers may find it fast-paced writing and useful advice.
Feb 28, 2018 Jeremy rated it did not like it I picked this up not knowing much of what it was about, but from the title I expected it to be a kind of anti-success book, to explain reasons why some popular "success is as easy as x" books are wrong. But no, this IS a success is as easy as x book, more or less. I'm allergic to books like this and really didn't like it. I was familiar with most of the points he made, and after looking up who this guy is, I'm wondering why anyone should read or trust what this guy has to say. Yes, I should have I picked this up not knowing much of what it was about, but from the title I expected it to be a kind of anti-success book, to explain reasons why some popular "success is as easy as x" books are wrong. But no, this IS a success is as easy as x book, more or less. I'm allergic to books like this and really didn't like it. I was familiar with most of the points he made, and after looking up who this guy is, I'm wondering why anyone should read or trust what this guy has to say. Yes, I should have looked this up before, but I listened to it as an audiobook so my opportunity cost was low. ...more
"Much of what we’ve been told about the qualities that lead to achievement is logical, earnest—and downright wrong. We’ll explode the myths, look at the science behind what separates the extremely successful from the rest of us,
learn what we can do to be more like them, and find out in some cases why it’s good that we aren’t. Sometimes what produces success is raw talent, sometimes it’s the nice things our moms told us to do, and other times it’s the exact opposite. Barking Up the Wrong Tree was an excellent look into the topic. The book is my second from the author, after his 2022 book
Plays Well with Others, which I also really enjoyed. Author
Eric Barker's work has been mentioned in the New York Times, The Wall Street Journal, The Atlantic Monthly, TIME magazine, The Week, and Business Insider. He is a former Hollywood screenwriter, having worked on projects for Walt Disney Pictures, Twentieth Century Fox, and Revolution Studios. Over 500,000 people have subscribed to his weekly newsletter. Eric Barker: Barker gets the writing here off on a good foot, with a well-written intro. He talks about a champion bicycle racer who is seriously mentally disturbed. The scope of the book is also laid out. So, what does success look like? It is often found in those that deviate far from the mean. Barker expands further: "...But as any mathematician knows, averages can be deceptive. Andrew Robinson, CEO of famed advertising agency BBDO, once said, “When your head is in a refrigerator and your feet on a burner, the average temperature is okay. I am always cautious about averages.” In this quote, Barker talks about choosing your "pond" effectively: "When you choose your pond wisely, you can best leverage your type, your signature strengths, and your context to create tremendous value. This is what makes for a great career, but such self-knowledge can create value wherever you choose to apply it."And failure in this quote: "So what happens if you fail at something? You won’t die like Batman, so you shouldn’t act like you’re Batman. Try being more like a comedian or a kindergartener. Try things. Quit what fails. Then apply grit. Barker writes about the importance of experimenting with different methodologies, and exploring many separate paths to achieve a goal: "The same is true for successful companies. They don’t just try new things; they often completely reinvent themselves when their little bets bear fruit. YouTube started out as a dating site, of all things. eBay was originally focused on selling PEZ dispensers. Google began as a project to organize library book searches. The scope of the book is quite broad, and Barker covers a lot of ground here. Some more of what is covered here includes: • The eccentricity of musician Glenn Gould. • Olympic swimmer Michael Phelps. • Social cooperation among pirates and criminal gangs. • Robert Axelrod and the tit-for-tat strategy in game theory. • "Grit"; the SEAL BUD/S training. Martin Seligman's "learned helplessness" experiments. • The power of stories in our lives and the broader culture. • Cognitive reframing; "games" to achieve goals. Some excellent writing here. • Strategic quitting; opportunity costs. Some more excellent writing. • Romantic relationships; arranged vs love marriages. • Introverts vs extroverts. • The importance of mentors. • The importance of gratitude; hedonic adaptation. • Self-compassion and supportive self-talk, instead of self-esteem. • The importance of good sleep. • Work-life balance. ************************ I wasn't sure what to expect from this one going in... I was pleasantly surprised by the quality of writing here. I really enjoyed this book.
Mar 08, 2020 Anastasia rated it it was amazing The first thing that attracted my attention about this book was the title. Idioms are so much fun when turned on their head. The second thing is that science and common knowledge are so different in many ways. Remember your grandmother telling you not to sit in a draft,
you will get sick. So this book was a must read. Well it does cover some interesting things. Time management, leisure and work balance, working smarter not harder, are all covered. While the book is aimed more at executives, many Well it does cover some interesting things. Time management, leisure and work balance, working smarter not harder, are all covered. While the book is aimed more at executives, many will find some good advice in here. Yes, working mom's and stay-at-home mom's will also find some great ways to balance their lives as well. As a parent I am able to apply some ideas to how to raise my
kids. I know a book about success is not about parenting, but with two older teens entering adulthoood it has given me some perspective. The conclusion has some workbook activities that I will be trying out on myself, and encouraging my university student to do the same. So, yep I liked this book and do recommend it.
Jun 27, 2019 Kan Bhalla rated it it was amazing Success doesn't necessarily mean being rich or
famous. Each of us define success for ourselves. For most part, what matters are these four metrics: To be truly successful, we need to spend our time on each of these week after week after week, and not put some of these on back burner for10 yea To be truly successful, we need to spend our time on each of these week after week
after week, and not put some of these on back burner for10 years because we are too busy spending our time on only one of these right now. And it's not a zero sum game. All of us can be successful!
Aug 08, 2020 Jacob Gubbrud rated it it was amazing Super interesting read, love the discussion and examples throughout the book, highly recommend!
Jul 02, 2021 Anshu ʕっ•ᴥ•ʔっ rated it did not like it
Have some mental health issue, become an introvert, be more depressed, work like a donkey and BOOM!!💥 YOU CAN BE SUCCESSFUL MY FRIEND. I am not saying he is wrong, all the facts he told are actually...
well.... not exactly incorrect. I am not saying he is wrong, all the facts he told are actually... well.... not exactly incorrect. It is a good book to show you how you can be successful even if you don't fit in
with the conventional way "How to be Successful". And yes I stopped paying attention after like 70-100 pages and so just skimmed through rest and later just DNF'ed it altogether. Sometimes u don't like what you don't like no matter how much others like it. It just wasn't for me maybe
because I fell right into the conventional definition of successful and hence won't ever do anything revolutionary, so I am sure you will excuse me if I didn't felt all happy about it. :)
May 30, 2021 Rita Viegas rated it it was amazing This book felt bit as if someone had gathered my
favourite non-fiction authors and topics (Give & Take - Adam Grant, Grit - Angela Duckworth, Mindset - Carol Dweck, Quiet Power - Susan Cain, Deep Work - Cal Newport) added a bit of humor, some new authors and ideas and compiled some of the best approaches to follow for a more successful life in all dimensions.
Jul 26, 2017 Rin rated it liked it I thought this book was about something else, but instead, it's one of those "everything you know is wrong" self-help books I've read 100 times before. I wouldn't have started it had I known that. After all, it did claim it was to discuss the "science" of success. However, what they meant was that they were going to use anecdotal stories to sing the same old song to people aiming to move up the corporate ladder. Don't get me wrong, i guess there's nothing wrong with that. I'm just tired of this I thought this book was about something else, but instead, it's one of those "everything you know is wrong" self-help books I've read 100 times before. I wouldn't have started it had I known that. After all, it did claim it was to discuss the "science" of success. However, what they meant was that they were going to use anecdotal stories to sing the same old song to people aiming to move up the corporate ladder. Don't get me wrong, i guess there's nothing wrong with that. I'm just tired of this genre. ...more
Great read about how
to be the most successful person you can be This is a fantastic book full of wonderful advice from detailed research along with some great anecdotes unique to this book. Eric covers lots of ground over many topics and at times it feels like a best hits of legendary self development books which he summarises perfectly. I'd recommend this (and his blog) to anyone! This is a fantastic book full of wonderful advice from detailed research along with some great anecdotes unique to this book. Eric covers lots of ground over many topics and at times it feels like a best hits of legendary self development books which he summarises perfectly. I'd recommend this (and his blog) to anyone!
Nov 02, 2018 Rick Wilson rated it really liked it Eric does a good job aggregating modern self help/business success literature into one readable book. Read this and don’t bother with all the other crap out there Eric Barker is the author of The Wall Street Journal bestseller Barking Up the Wrong Tree which has sold over half a million copies and been translated into 19 languages. Over 500,000 people have subscribed to his weekly newsletter. His work has been covered by The New York Times, The Atlantic, The Financial Times, and others. Eric is also a sought-after speaker, having given talks at MIT, Yal Eric Barker is the author of The Wall Street Journal bestseller Barking Up the Wrong Tree which has sold over half a million copies and been translated into 19 languages. Over 500,000 people have subscribed to his weekly newsletter. His work has been covered by The New York Times, The Atlantic, The Financial Times, and others. Eric is also a sought-after speaker, having given talks at MIT, Yale, Google, the United States Military Central Command (CENTCOM), and the Olympic Training Center. His new book, “Plays Well with Others,” will be released by HarperCollins in May of 2022. ...more Related ArticlesNew year, new you! Or perhaps the same you, but a 2.0 version? The start of a new year is known for resolutions, which, as we all know,... “We spend too much time trying to be “good” when good is often merely average. To be great we must be different. And that doesn’t come from trying to follow society’s vision of what is best, because society doesn’t always know what it needs. More often being the best means just being the best version of you.” — 23 likes “We crave ease, but stimulation is what really makes us happy.” — 18 likes More quotes…Welcome back. Just a moment while we sign you in to your Goodreads account. Is barking up the wrong tree a good book?Barker teachers readers why most of what they previously believed about success is "wrong". Then he goes on to explain how they can improve themselves and their lives through lessons provided by unlikely - but entertaining - sources. I would recommend this book to anyone looking to improve success in their lives.
What does Bakadesuyo mean?But it is in fact Japanese because you studied Japanese in college. Yeah, I found out the first day of Japanese class that my last name means "moron" in Japanese and so Bakadesuyo is me introducing myself. It's "my name is Barker," or "I am an idiot" is actually the same sentence.
What does it mean to be barking up the wrong tree?idiom informal. to be wrong about the reason for something or the way to achieve something: She thinks it'll solve the problem, but I think she's barking up the wrong tree.
How do you use barking in the wrong tree in a sentence?He must face the fact that he is barking up the wrong tree. If you think that we do want another war, you are barking up the wrong tree. I am not certain that we are not all barking up the wrong tree about this.
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