We've all heard stories of women's husbands, boyfriends, brothers, or any male in their lives, going for younger women. Not to mention, the number of male middle-aged celebrities who are dating women half their age, some young enough to be their daughter. And honestly, it's somewhat of a mystery. A 2010 survey even tried to crack the code. Well, you might find some clarity in these reasons as to why men prefer dating younger women.
1. Younger women are more adventurous
With younger women, men seem to find their rebel tendencies quite enticing. They feel that younger women are ready to take on adventures and be spontaneous. After all, it's what makes them so exciting. The men fail to see that older women have not just the drive but the experience to make things more.
2. They crave eternal youth and so choose to be with a younger women
Getting older has its perks but there's also a lot of responsibility and burden to shoulder. It can really suck the joy out of living. These men have spent so long chasing after their goals that they forgot to slow down and enjoy the tiny moments in life. Being with a younger woman makes them feel young again... when they were able to enjoy those moments. With their partner being open to trying new things, they get excited knowing they have someone to do it with.
Getty Images3. Younger women are more open to new things sexually
Mature women, having experienced so much, know exactly what they want and won't settle for anything less. However, a younger woman is more likely to expand their sexual knowledge and that means exploration. Men like a challenge and so will be more than ready to explore.
4. Younger women make them feel wanted
Older men have a protective streak when it comes to their younger partners. They like being the person their partner calls for help, protection or advice. Older, mature women already know how to handle situations, so tend not to depend on the men for assistance. Not to mention, they find it easier to negotiate with a younger woman. An older woman has already set her own values and will be vocal if she feels neglected. So essentially, they think talking to a younger woman will be more fruitful.
5. Older women have an emotional maturity that some men can't handle
When they say that men will always have the emotional maturity of a teenager, they're not wrong. And it's exactly why they're more attracted to younger women. It's because both their minds are at the same maturity levels and men feel that younger women can understand them better.
6. Fear of commitment drives older men into the embrace of younger women
Getty ImagesThere are some men who are exactly mature enough to handle a serious commitment. It means they have to step out of the bubble they're living in and face the demons that are stopping them from finding a real connection. Older women have gone through so much already that they won't settle for mediocrity. They expect their man to look into themselves and figure out whether it's worth it all. Younger women, since they are still finding their identity, aren't as rigid in what they want from a relationship and are fine if things remain casual.
7. Some men might find women their age hard to control
The men who have an issue with giving up control or dominance are unable to connect with a woman their age. Why? Because that woman knows how she deserves to be treated and will refuse to be treated as anything less. Their identity is established while a younger woman is still looking to find hers. So the latter may not put up as much of a fight for control.
8. Intimacy might scare older men
Older men know very well that women of their age aren't into casual dating. Older women know their needs and the emotional connection they want to have in their relationship. Any man who isn't willing to offer it... well, they can close the door on the way out. However, younger women are more flexible about having their needs met. This isn't as much of a treat to older men.
But it's not always because of these reasons that older men date younger women. Some times, they strike gold and have a genuine connection with their younger partners. And when that happens, it is sheer magic!
Disclaimer: This article is based on insights from different sources. The views expressed here are those of the writer.
Cover image source: Getty Images | Photos by Frazer Harrison
Have you ever been attracted to an older man? Suddenly your friend’s father or his/her older brother or even your college professor seems like a forbidden fruit you want to indulge in. When you see Milind Soman, you can’t stop drooling over this silver fox and his mature personality. Young woman-older man relationships are common nowadays, especially among celebrities. From George Clooney and Amal Clooney, Hillary Burton and Dave Morgan, Ryan Reynolds and Blake Lively to Beyoncé and Jay-Z, so many celebrities have been in marriages with a huge age difference. So, what attracts a younger woman to an older man? Let’s find out.
According to a study conducted by Sara Skentelbery and Darren Fowler of St. Mary’s University (Halifax), women who date older men are looking for father figures. There’s a possibility that they were neglected by their fathers as children and are looking to compensate for that through the attention from older men. The study also says that older men come with the financial security that women often look for. On the other hand, when older men seek younger women as romantic partners, the fertility of their potential partners could be a subconscious factor at play. Whatever the reason, younger women’s attraction to older men cannot be denied.
If you often think, “Why do I like guys older than me? Why am I sexually attracted to older men?”, there could be a host of reasons at play. Which brings the question of what really attracts a younger woman to an older man into the spotlight. Studies on women often prefer older men often attribute it to both psychological and evolutionary parameters.
A Swedish study, for instance, attributes attraction to older men among younger men to differences in partner preferences. Men are more concerned with traits that predict high fertility in a potential partner and women with traits that indicate high resource availability. This once pattern is rooted in our primal needs for security and procreation, and offers a pretty straightforward answer to why do young women like older men.
While there is enough scientific evidence to validate this hypothesis, you can find the answer to do younger women like older men just by looking around. May-December relationships (where one partner is much younger than another partner) are becoming more and more common these days, making it clear as day that the attraction between younger women and older men is irrefutable. Besides, there is a growing acceptance for such relationships now. Not many people bat an eyelid seeing a young woman and older man with salt-and-pepper hair. In fact, there is something really attractive about this kind of pairing.
So why would a younger woman choose an older man? Hollywood actress Catherine Zeta Jones, who married 25-year-older Michael Douglas, had a love at first sight kind of love story. Michael Douglas in an interview said, “Thirty minutes after meeting her I said you will be the mother of my children.”
Seems Catherine was instantly convinced. Jones and Douglas have a son and daughter now. Their marriage that’s seen its ups and downs, and perhaps even a fair share of older man younger woman relationship issues, but they have been going strong. From the world of celebrities to people around us, we can find enough examples of attraction to older men among younger women.
But the question that still continues to baffle many is why. The “what does she see in him?” bafflement. So, what do younger women look for in older men? Are they just sexually attracted to older men or it is something more? The attraction between older men and younger women sets off some obvious sparks which are hard to resist.
Sometimes it’s just sexual attraction while there are times that it turns out into something more meaningful. Whether or not the relationship is meaningful or sexual, purely depends on compatibility and differs from person to person. Here are 11 things that attract a younger woman to an older man. When you actually fall in love, age is just a number.
1. They are more responsible and mature
We can all agree that a lot of young men act like grown-up kids or like a man child, as they’re popularly known. They run away from responsibilities and maturity is something you can’t expect from them. Many times, women find men of their age to lack a sense of responsibility. As women become financially independent, they may have less and less patience to deal with men who refuse to grow up.
They may tire of doing all the work and seek someone responsible and will be an equal partner in the relationship instead of being a liability. Women feel that older men would still be able to understand their problems because of their maturity levels. Women mature faster than men and seek someone to match their level of maturity. Older men are more responsible which makes them ideal for such women.
Related Reading: Dating An Older Man In Your 20s – 15 Things To Seriously Think About
2. A sense of security
Why do younger women like older men? Older men provide a sense of security, which is an essential criterion for a happy and healthy relationship. Most of the time, older men are more accomplished in life. As they reach the peak of their career trajectory, they acquire assets to secure their future. Apart from financial security, older men are also more emotionally secure and mature.
Women seek this well-rounded sense of security to be able to build a drama-free relationship, especially when they are thinking of settling down. They feel more comfortable knowing that their future is secure with such a person. What attracts a younger woman to an older man is they are at that stage of their life where they have their assets and investments in place. The most attractive age for a man is mid 30s or early 40s when he has a stable income, looks and libido on his side.
3. They are more experienced
Older men have played the field longer and are more experienced in navigating relationships and understanding the needs, desires and expectations of their partner. Their experience with women makes them adept in understanding women. They can deal with a woman’s mood swings and can also comfort them with the right words and actions.
Younger women feel more comfortable with older men because they know they can lean on their partners for support when needed. An older man, wise from years of experience, knows what to say when to comfort his partner and uplift her spirits when she feels low.
While older man younger woman relationship issues exist, there is also scope for greater emotional intimacy in such a connection. Also, older men tend to handle adverse situations better, they do not jump to conclusions, and are calm and reasonable. A younger woman finds an older man a reassuring presence in her life.
Related Reading: 8 Ways To Cultivate Emotional Safety In Your Relationship
4. The daddy issues
What fuels attraction to older men among younger women? One probable reason for this can be daddy issues. Women who have complicated relationships with their father tend to get easily attracted to older men. They seek in their partners the attributes that their father lacked or a relationship dynamic that is more fulfilling than the one they share with their fathers.
An older man perfectly fits the bill of someone who understands her like her father didn’t. On the other hand, younger women may seek an older man who is a spitting image of her father’s personality, and may get into a relationship hoping for a better equation than she shared with her father. This is, basically, a way of reliving the experiences she has had with her father and hoping for a different outcome – a tendency commonly seen in women who grow up around emotionally withholding fathers.
Whatever the subconscious trigger, the bottom line is that women who are attracted to older men seek a mentor, a friend and someone to give them advice. In the process, these younger women get attracted to the wisdom and maturity of older men and fall for them. They want to be protected, sheltered, taken care of and that is what drives a younger woman toward an older man.
5. They know what they want in life
If you ask a guy of your age what he wants in life, he will either stare at you with a blank expression or may give you an immature answer like, “Playing video games all my life” or “Nothing but sleep”. An older man will have a more insightful response to the same question. He may talk about his ambitions, career objectives, future prospects, goals, and values.
This clarity and maturity is one the primary reasons behind young women’s attraction to older men. Older men are driven by goals and direction, which is what makes younger women get attracted to them. This is because women are usually more mature than men and they look for someone who would match their level of maturity and can meet their emotional needs in a relationship.
This maturity is also what helps age-gap couples navigate through the older man younger woman relationship issues they may encounter along the way.
6. Their mysterious aura
Sexy older men have this sense of mysteriousness about them. The nonchalance in their demeanor, the look of seriousness on their face suggests that there’s something deeper to their personalities and you can’t help but want to know more about their story. This aura of mysteriousness can be a major trigger for the attraction a younger woman may feel toward an older man.
The less an older man talks about himself, the more you want to know about him. The equation seems something straight out of a rom-com, where a younger woman may feel as if she is the one who can get the older man to let in guard down, breach the walls he has erected around his heart and bring happiness back into his life again. A man who has lived his life has stories of adventures and struggles, of failures and success to tell, and that can be mesmerizing to a young woman.
7. They are more understanding
Older men are typically more understanding than younger men. They know better than to sweat the small stuff and don’t make mountains out of molehill. Older men also tend to be more patient in relationships and try to get to the root of the problem and resolve the issue rather than playing the blame game.
Their conflict resolution skills are exceptional. They keep their calm and will try to understand you first before jumping to conclusions. Women find this attractive because they feel like older men understand their feelings, value their emotions and know how to respect them.
Older men know how to choose their battles and would not let unpleasantness seep into the relationship over small issues. They abhor petty fights, owing to which a relationship with them could prove to be strong and peaceful.
Related Reading: 8 Relationship Problems Faced By Couples With Huge Age Difference
8. They aren’t afraid of commitment
Younger men often reflect signs of commitment issues in a relationship and dealing with them can be an extremely emotionally draining experience. Younger women eventually get tired of heartbreaks and look for someone who isn’t going to get cold feet at the first hint of commitment or avoid the “where is this going” conversation like the plague.
By contrast, older men can seem like the perfect match because they are at a stage of life where they are not afraid of taking the leap toward building a meaningful long-term relationship and even settling down with the person they love. They aren’t afraid of commitment, which makes a younger woman feel more secure in the relationship as she can rest assured that this is not going to end up to be another fling.
Younger women feel that being with an older man can free them from the vicious cycle of heartbreak and heartache. But can an older man love a younger woman? Yes, with all his heart. That’s why some younger women older man love stories are so successful.
9. They make a good parent material
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Why do young women like older men? One of the many reasons for the palpable attraction between the two is that older men are poised to be better parents. If it’s the case of a younger woman dating a single dad, watching her man take care of his children can reassure her that he is capable of being a good parent, should they choose to cross that bridge as a couple.
Even if he is not a parent, the emotional maturity and financial security of an older man is enough to assure a woman that he is prepared to tackle the challenges of parenting if and when they decide to raise a family together. An older man is more likely to share the load of parenting with his partner, making the journey more fruitful and less challenging.
This is one of the reasons why despite all the potential older man younger woman relationship issues, there is a magnetic attraction between the two. When they come together as a couple, they can successfully navigate whatever challenges life throws their way.
Related Reading: 10 Must Watch Younger Man Older Woman Relationship Movies
10. They are good in bed
Another reason why older men trump their younger counterparts as potential mates is the experience they have with women. Having been through the rigmarole of dating and relationships in the heydays, older men are more experienced in bed and know how to satisfy a woman sexually. They understand that good sex is not only about their own needs but also that of their partner.
The palpable sexual chemistry between an older man and a younger woman is what ignites a spark of passion between them. It’s hard for the spark to not go off when you’re dating an older man. If you always think, “Why am I sexually attracted to older men?”, the reason is that they know their way around a woman’s body and can make you experience levels of pleasure you didn’t know was possible.
11. The heart wants what it wants
Sometimes a younger woman dating an older man has nothing to do with his age. We say that love is blind and the heart wants what it wants. After all, there is no set age difference for a great marriage. Sometimes it’s just compatibility and understanding that just makes them click.
Cupid can strike anywhere and at any time. It can bring two totally opposite people together, even if they have a huge age gap. For people whose age isn’t a factor, a huge age gap doesn’t make a difference.
- Attraction between younger women and older men is both a psychological and evolutionary phenomenon
- The maturity, stability and security that an older man has to offer is exactly what a younger woman seeks in a relationship
- Despite potential older man younger woman relationship issues, couples can build a lasting bond
Can an older man love a younger woman? How does it feel like dating older men? Dating an older man will make you feel that you’ve finally found someone who wants the same thing as you. However, there are some important things that you need to think about. Will this person be able to handle your immaturity or will he treat you like a child? What are his plans for children? Where do you see your future with him? You need these questions answered as you don’t want to end up like Monica Geller who had to leave Richard because he didn’t want kids.
FAQs
1. Do younger women like older men?
Yes, younger women tend to like older men more than men their own age. Several studies on women often prefer older men tie this tendency to both psychological and evolutionary factors. The bottom line is that older men can offer younger women more stable and secure relationships, that’s why they tend to gravitate toward each other.
2. What do you call a younger girl who likes older guys?
A younger girl who likes older men is known as a gerontophile or gerontosexual. In common parlance, just as the woman who likes younger guys is called a cougar, a younger girl who likes older men is called a panther. However, such labels and stereotypes are never in good taste, a relationship is a relationship, irrespective of the age, race, or sexuality of the people in it.
3. What is it called when an older man dates a younger woman?
A relationship involving an older man and younger woman or vice versa is known as a May-December romance.
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