Im not here to make friends reddit

In my experience, this is generally said in a work environment. And it usually comes from people who don’t like to feel forced to be friendly or perhaps super diplomatic with others. I think its an honest statement that lets you know what to expect from that person. Not insufferable nor obnoxious really- Just a direct, no-beating -around-the-bush personality.

When i first started at my job someone said this to me a couple weeks in. Being very direct myself, I didn’t take it on the negative, I just accepted it as their personal preference. Funny though, a year later this person and I are pretty good friends. We give eachother advice, help with stuff and have casual conversation on the regular. Giving him space and only addressing him for work reasons is what indicated to him I respected his choices- which made us great candidates for a friendship in the long run.

Sometimes people want to be left alone to do their shit and are not too interested in knowing the people around them. Its nothing against you OP, or anyone else. They just know what they like- Its just their preference. I think it should be respected, especially since they are being open and direct about it and not hurting anyone in the process. Just saving time and energy really.

7

Posted by12 years ago

Archived

Im not here to make friends reddit

youtube.com/watch?...

4 comments

67% Upvoted

This thread is archived

New comments cannot be posted and votes cannot be cast

View discussions in 8 other communities

Im not here to make friends reddit

level 1

[deleted]

· 12 yr. ago

0:24 "fuck them <beep>" ... censor 'bitches' but not 'fuck?'

2

level 1

· 12 yr. ago

I hated Marcel.

1

level 1

· 12 yr. ago

So it turns out every reality show is exactly the same. Glad I never wasted any time with any of them.

I didn't not watch reality shows to make friends. Those shows didn't get watched because I wanted to feel a smug sense of superiority over everyone.

1

level 1

· 12 yr. ago

I'm not here to make friends.

1

You're working in the wrong kitchen then. Dishies get paid $12-$13 an hour starting off and then tons of room for moving up. People always complain but there are kitchens out there who pay a fair wage. Yall just either need to look more or maybe move. But don't say that cooking can't make you good money because it's entirely possible. Fuck, I'm doing it and the rest of the crew I work with are making good money.

Edit: I love cooking, but I'm also there for the paycheck :)

I actually agreed to be friends with him, and we exchanged social media. We've had a few conversations since, and he made it pretty clear he still finds me "cute." He's also told me about turning down other girls on tinder out of the same fears he told me lol.

He seems like a good guy so I think I'll take his word over someone on Reddit who implied I might be "too easy"...

I used to have the same problem, nothing to talk about with other people. And i had a terrible time trying to make friends.

My advice, start doing things for yourself, go for walks, learn to juggle, start teaching yourself something, literally anything that all that interest you, even things you're not sure about you can try and if you don't like it, stop.

But trying knew things gives you something to talk about. If someone asks what your hobbies are you can say, "well recently I've started doing.... " And fill in the blank or you can say, right now i don't have any hobbies that I'm super into, but I've been trying out a few things like....". And then you can talk about what you enjoyed or didn't enjoy.

And you can use these topics in other conversations as well, when someone asks if you are doing anything these weekend, tell them your trying this, or maybe gonna do that. And it doesn't need to be something crazy, one of hobbies is puzzles and when people ask what my plans are, if my plan is to work on a puzzle which often leads to more of a conversation because most people say that sounds boring and i can talk about how much I love puzzles and then ask them what they like doing.

Or if someone mentions they do something that you've also started doing, then you have a common ground to all about.

Making friends really isn't about haven't something to offer, it's about being able to listen and answer. Listening is the easy part, answering is hard, but if you really listen often times people will give something that you can latch onto and ask more about or even share something about yourself that relates.

Also, i think of something comes up you've never experienced, saying you've never done that, is totally valid and opens up a whole new conversation. You can talk about why you never did, if you would like to now or not, ask other people their experience etc .